Sure, coupons are great. Frugal spending is nice, too. It’s time, though, to step it up! It’s time to make saving money more than a hobby… even more than a passion. It’s time to make saving money a true life-obsession! Here are some great ways to start.
That morning shower is a luxury that makes your water bill spike! Consider showering only once every week. If anybody asks “What is that smell?!” Simply answer: “That, my friend, is the smell of money being saved.”
Don’t stop there! Make that shower nice and cold, too. It will wake you up while keeping your water heater from doing any unnecessary work. Does your husband need to shower, too? Bring him in! You’ll save money by showering together.
Eating For Less!
Don’t worry; you can still eat your cereal with milk. However, you’ll save money by letting your spoons rest in the drawer and eating your cereal with a fork. This way, you’ll have plenty of leftover milk to pour back in the jug! This will also give your next glass of milk a delicious hint of Fruity Pebbles.
The next tasty tip requires some stealth. You’ll have to learn when your local bakery throws out their bread at the end of the day. Simply hide behind the trash and grab the baked goods when they’re sadly thrown away! Keep an eye out for some delectable doughnuts, too. Just be sure to wipe away any unwanted garbage that they may have come in contact with.
The Cheapest TV You’ll Ever Buy
Who needs a TV? The super-frugal don’t! Just get a large picture frame, then take some old socks and make puppets of your favorite TV characters. Sure, you’ll only be able to reenact the movies and shows you’ve seen 100 times, but those ones are your favorites! Your family will forget they’re not watching the real thing when you convincingly say, from one hand to the other in your best Humphrey Bogart: “Here’s looking at you, kid”.
Saving on Supplies
Does your kid need school supplies? Don’t even think about paying for pens or pencils. You can find all of the complimentary pens you need at your bank’s drive-through. The pencils can be found in the clubhouse of your local golf course!
Okay, you do need toilet paper. You can save, though, by buying two-ply toilet paper and pulling the sheets apart. You now have twice as much TP!
Who needs a phone?
That cell phone that’s practically attached to your hip? Get rid of it! Instead, you can be that annoying (but thrifty!) friend that always asks others to borrow their phone. Just be sure to carry around a list of all the phone numbers you’ll need to call. Make sure to become friends with your neighbors, too. You’ll love the convenience of walking next door to use the phone! Kiss that bill goodbye.
*IMPORTANT NOTE: These tips are NOT to be taken seriously! In fact, they’re all terrible ideas! They’re unsanitary, unsafe, impractical and frowned upon; nobody should do them! Again, these are only for reading fun. For real tips, see Get it Free’s other blog articles and social media sites. However, share these with your friends and see if you can get them to believe them on April Fools’ Day!
Happy April Fools’ Day!
If you have any other ridiculous savings ideas that belong on this list, add them in the comments!