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Funny Money – Quotes About Cash

Blog | June 1st, 2012


Money – it seems to dictate a lot of decisions, problems, accomplishments and trials in our lives. Like anything serious, people have said some pretty funny things about it. Thankfully.

“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason

Why, how convenient?!

“It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white… the only color that really matters is green.” – Peter Griffin, Family Guy

Thank you, Family Guy, for taking care of America’s race issues.

“Lack of money is the root of all evil.” – George Bernard Shaw

If that’s the case, then does Get it Free help people become less evil?

“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.” –Yogi Berra

Wow! That’s so… wait, what?

“The trick is to stop thinking of it as ‘your’ money.” – IRS auditor

Oh, we know it’s not. Our kids take most of it.

“Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy.” – Groucho Marx

Does this include dinner with the in-laws?

“Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.” –Woody Allen

Now it makes sense…

“If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.” – Dorothy Parker

There are a couple heiress celebrities that come to mind…

“The easiest way for your children to learn about money is for you not to have any.” – Katharine Whitehorn

While this may be true, most kids would probably rather just skip learning about money part altogether, given the choice.

“Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game.” – Donald Trump

Monopoly is probably a safer money game for the rest of us to play.

“Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort.” – Helen Gurley Brown

Being miserable in a giant hot tub with a Mai Tai does sound nicer than being miserable in house with a leaky roof.

“Dogs have no money. Isn’t that amazing? They’re broke their entire lives. But they get through. You know why dogs have no money? No pockets.” – Jerry Seinfeld

What about those little doggie sweaters? Can we put pockets in them?

“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson

Let’s just take his word for it, okay?

“Don’t tell me where your priorities are. Show me where you spend your money and I’ll tell you what they are.” – James W. Frick

Starbucks and clothes for the kids?

Do you know any great money quotes? Share them with us!